Tag Archives: Love

More to Learn

This weekend I didn’t get as much done around here as I could have. The only project I helped with didn’t see my help till it was almost done. If you had stopped by last night around 9 pm, you would have found me standing in a large fish tank, attempting to smooth wrinkles in the lining, as the garden hose filled it. See the husband has been working on developing an aquaponics gardening system for the large green house and I was doing my part to help out last night.

More to Learn

The hubby busy building and assembling the fish tank.

The only other major things I did around the house this weekend involved my kitchen, the cooking and cleaning of it. Well that and cupcakes. My sweet sister-in-law turned 20 and I made red velvet cheesecake stuffed cupcakes for her.

See the reason I didn’t step outside the kitchen much and do more work around the property is simple, I stepped outside the kitchen and did something better with my time. I chose to spend time with the Lord. “Martha, Martha,” the Lord answered, “you are worried and upset about many things, but few things are needed—or indeed only one. Mary has chosen what is better, and it will not be taken away from her.”  Luke 10: 41-42 See this weekend I was a little more Mary and a little less Martha. I chose what was better. I chose to spend time with my Lord, learning about my Lord, deepening my walk with him, and walking away refreshed. I went to a women’s conference hosted by my church. The topic: Walking In Faith.

I learned many things, and I was reminded of many things. You are never too old or too young to be used by the Lord. We just need to ask the Holy Spirit  to come and do work in our lives. Don’t judge who you are, by how you are. In other words our worth is not defined by our choices or our circumstances, but rather by the love of our Creator. And those are just a couple of the nuggets that touched my heart.

Shirt design by NBT

Shirt design by NBT

Through out this confrence I was also challenged to let go of stress. One of the fruits of the spirit is joy. Laughter is a by product of joy, and you can not hold on to stress and laugh. To take this idea further the speaker offered some points to help you, “Be Up In A Down World.”

  1. Pay attention to the world around you, God’s beauty is everywhere.
  2. Listen. People in our lives need us to listen.
  3. Learn. Read. Discover New things.
  4. Want to feel better? Laugh.
  5. Ask for help. Lean on one another. (Or as I heard someone else say once, don’t stand in the way of your own blessings.)
  6. Love. We all could use more love.

As the confrence wrapped up and I was listening to the closing music and reflecting on what the Lord laid upon my heart, I penned my final thoughts.

I need more laughter in my life.
I need less computer.
I need more God.
I need less stress.
I need more patience.
I need less tv.
I need more books.
I need less busy.

*** What is it that you could use more or less of in your life?***

***As always if this post has touched you in anyway please feel free to share it, you never know who else in your life might benefit from reading this today. All I as is that you would link back to the original post. Thank you.***

Fruit of the Spirit: Love Your Children

(Disclaimer: This blog contains affiliate links.  Meaning I will get a small referral rate if you purchase after having clicked on the link. I will not endorse a product I do not believe in, so any endorsement on my part is purely my own.)

“Fathers, do not embitter your children, or they will become discouraged.” Colossians 3:21

 

“These commandments that I give you today are to be on your hearts.  Impress them on your children. Talk about them when you sit at home and when you walk along the road, when you lie down and when you get up.  Tie them as symbols on your hands and bind them on your foreheads. Write them on the door frames of your houses and on your gates.”  Deuteronomy 6:6-9

 

“Children are a heritage from the Lord, offspring a reward from him.  Like arrows in the hands of a warrior are children born in one’s youth.  Blessed is the man whose quiver is full of them.  They will not be put to shame when they contend with their opponents in court.”  Psalm 127:3-5

 Under the Sun - Fruit of the Spirit: Love Your Children

From these three verses it is clear what the Lord expects from parents. What is not clear is how we implement these truths. That there, is the beauty of the deal. There are many ways to raise your children in a Godly, loving home, and still seek after the truth of these three verses.

Whether you homeschool or send your children to the local school, you are still doing the best job you know how. Maybe instead you did CIO or maybe you co-slept. Maybe you used formula or maybe you were a mother who did extended breastfeeding. There is no winner and no loser. One parent is not better than the other. We are each doing the best job we know how to do, but still there are a few things that EVERY Christian parent should be seeking to do with their children.

Colossians 3:21 tells us though that no matter our choices we still need to speak love into the lives of our children. Our children have tender hearts. They are seeking love and approval. Clay Clarkson in his book, Educating the WholeHearted Child — Third Edition, says, “God has designed your children’s hearts to expect love from their parents. When they don’t receive familial and parental love, it is a kind of neglect of their spiritual and emotional nourishment, in the same way that not receiving food would neglect their physical nourishment. A child whose need for love is neglected will begin to close their heart and emotions out of self-protection.” See though you don’t have to embitter, as the bible says, or neglect their spiritual and emotional nourishment, as Clay describes it. Instead encourage them, express your love in words, hug them, and show them just how much you value them. Are your actions matching your words?

Deuteronomy 6:6-9 clearly expresses that we need to teach our children what the bible has to say to them. We can not do that though if first we are not seeking the knowledge ourselves. Live a life that you would be proud for your child to imitate. Are you spending time reading and learning from the Lord each day? Do praise and worship songs fill the air of your home? (They need not be the only songs, but are they given any air time?) Our children are aware if what we are preaching is matching up to the life we are leading. We don’t need to do everything perfectly, but we need to continue to grow in the Lord. Even in our mistakes they can learn much. But it doesn’t stop there. Are you spending time reading to them, and teaching them how to apply what they read to their lives? Guide them.  They need us to be an active guide, not just modeling the behavior we expect, but teaching them how to find the answers for themselves as well.

Children are a heritage

Psalm 127:3-5 Is a reminder that I have written on the black board by my laundry room. Our children are one of the great gifts that the Lord has to offer. Yes there will be days they challenge you. Parenting seems to stretch you in ways you never realized you needed stretching, and when the days get long and your patience gets thin, it can be easy to forget they are a gift from the Lord. So today I remind you to breathe and tell yourself that the Lord gifted these children to you. He didn’t bring them to anyone other than you. God saw to it that you would be the parent to your child. Appreciate that for a moment. He has trusted you with his workmanship (Ephesians 2:10,) his sons [and daughters] (Galatians 3:26-27.) It is that reason I have Psalm 127:3 wrote in large letters in my home, so when my patience runs thin I can remember that they are his gift to me. And your children are the Lord’s gift to you.

So today I say love your babies. Go raise them with the knowledge of the Lord. Get through the day-to-day issues of this world the best way you know how, and know you are loved. (John 3:16)

***If this post has touched you in any way please feel free to share this post. The only thing I ask is to please back to the original. And as always feel free to share via social media. If you have missed any of my prior posts in this series you can find them here : Introduction, Love Your God, Love Your Wives, and Submitting To And Respecting Our Husbands.*** 

 

Creative K Kids

Fruit of the Spirit: Submitting To And Respecting Our Husbands

“Wives, submit yourselves to your own husbands as you do to the Lord. For the husband is the head of the wife as Christ is the head of the church, his body, of which he is the Savior. 24 Now as the church submits to Christ, so also wives should submit to their husbands in everything.” Ephesians 5:22-24

“… and the wife must respect her husband.” Ephesians 5: 33b

Submitting to And Respecting Your Husbands

There it is two of the hottest and scariest topics to ever bring up in conversation in this culture, especially if you adhere to those ideas. A couple of weeks ago a friend and I were talking and I said, “Yes I am all for submission in marriage.” That is a far as I could get and her eyes got wide, and her jaw dropped, just a little. I could read her face that she had whole host of things to say in response, but before she could get there I stopped a moment and asked her to hear me out follow me with this a moment and that is what I am asking you to do. Follow me with this a moment and if you disagree or have questions when I am done I  am here to listen.

You are also probably wondering how these topics relate to love and ultimately fruit of the spirit. It is my sincere and heart-felt belief that it is through submission and respect toward our husbands that we demonstrate the kind of love that God is calling us toward in our marriages. I understand in this modern age we want to be independent woman. We want to be strong. We want to have it all, and we want to prove we are equal to men. These verses apply to even the most independent and modern of women today. God is not calling us to a position of weakness, but rather love and honor.

I heard someone talk about submission once in the context of the military chain of command. Imagine for the moment that God has made your husband the captain, or the CO, of your household, and you, the wife, second in command or the XO. Does your husband’s position negate the authority of yours? No, you are still a strong capable woman who has years of experience that you bring to this position. You are the one he can trust to take care of things in his stead. You are the one he can turn to, to help him sort through difficult decisions. Your husband may even defer to your expertise in many areas of decision-making. But the Lord has said that as the husband he is still the head of the household.

What does that mean then? It means as the CO he is responsible for the decisions of the household, even if he deferred to your best judgement. He will be the one held accountable for the decisions of the household, even if you make them together. So when I say I submit to your husbands this is what I am saying, “Let him lead. Provide wise counsel, but let him lead.” You married this man. Trust him. Trust his judgement. Believe in him.

Now I am not saying to let him lead you down the path of sin. You know what sin is, and you know how God feels about sin. God is an even higher authority than anyone here on earth. So as long as your husband’s leading lines up with scripture: Follow. So you if you two are disagreeing over say paint colors and not with issues of sin follow your husband’s lead.

As the XO of our household’s it is also our responsibility to be respectful toward our husband’s. Now some of you may be arguing right about now that my husband doesn’t deserve my respect. When he acts in a particular way then I will so him respect. If we refer back to Ephesians 5:33 we will see that we are not told to  respect our husbands some of the time, when we feel like it, or even when he earns our respect. The wife is told to respect her husband, no conditions or pre-requisites, just unconditional respect.

What does that look like? It looks like no longer airing his ‘offenses’ to any and every listening ear. It means standing up for him when someone asks well how do you possibly deal with that sort of behavior. (He is a grown man, capable of making his own decisions, and he just likes to have fun.) It means extending him trust. Respect is bragging about his accomplishments and working together behind the scenes to fix the rough patches. It means stop nagging, and start asking. It means all that and so much more.

Ladies what can you do today that would be a little more respectful than you did yesterday? In what ways could you let your husband lead the household a bit more?

*** If you have missed any of the prior discussions in this series you can find them here: IntroductionLove Your God, and Love Your Wives . As always please feel free to share the posts, just remember to link back to the original. You never know who will be blessed because you shared this.***

 

 

Creative K Kids

{Rusty} Under the Sun: Fruit of the Spirit- Love Your Wives

Ephesians 5:25-28 “Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her to make her holy, cleansing her by the washing with water through the word, and to present her to himself as a radiant church, without stain or wrinkle or any other blemish, but holy and blameless.  In this same way, husbands ought to love their wives as their own bodies. He who loves his wife loves himself.”

Fruite of the Spirit: Love Your Wives

I spent nearly a decade on active duty in the US Navy.  I saw more than my share of failed marriages.  Many never even knew God.  I have been married to Sara for over a decade now.  We have had our rough seas, but we have made it through, and I can’t help but think that it’s because we’ve had God guiding one or both of us.

Far too many men think that “I am married, so she does what I say, and that is that!”  Boy, are you wrong!  The vast majority of failed marriages are because one or both of the participants don’t think the other is pulling their share.  A lot of the times it’s the men that think they are entitled to a hot meal when they get home, a cold beer, and an uninterrupted game on the tube after.  Wrong again!

If you want to make a marriage work, then you need to approach it the way Jesus approached his bride, the Church.  He didn’t demand anything from her.  On the contrary, he helped her, washed her, got her ready, and then when she was clean and dressed in the purest of linens took her as his bride, in front of the whole world.  He made this promise, everlasting, so that we would know what we should model our relationships after.  All we have to do is be willing to put our mate first.

So often, you will find that a woman is willing to bend over backwards to please her husband.  Cook his favorite meals any day of the week.  Mix a drink after a tough day at work.  Let him out for a night with the fellas.  How often do men try to “hang the moon” for their wives anymore?  Today’s society is so male-centric that it’s sometimes frowned upon when a man shows an interest in taking care of his wife the way he ought to.  It is really quite simple;
If you want your spouse to do it for you, then you should be willing to do it for them!!!

I can’t say that enough.  In our house, Sara tends house and raises the girls.  I have to work outside the home.  If she wanted to swap, I would be happy to let her, and she knows it.  I also know, that if I can’t take people anymore, that she is willing to go back to work and I can stay home.  We both help out with the farm chores.  We both take care of the girls when we can, but for the ten to twelve hours a day that I am gone,  it’s her.  She’s pretty good at it, and I don’t tell her often enough.

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***Please join me next week as we look at the  exhortation for the wife, “must respect her husband.” If you have missed any of the prior discussions in this series you can find them here: Introduction, Love Your God. As always please feel free to share the posts, just remember to link back to the original. You never know who will be blessed because you shared this.***

 

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Creative K Kids
’Called

Fruit of the Spirit: Love Your God and The Bloggers Brag Pinterest Party

Before we can love our husbands, our kids, our friends, our neighbors, or even our enemies we need to know God and love God. It is from Him that we  learn what love is to look like. It is from him we learn how love is to behave. It is from him that we learn to recognize love when it shown to us. “Whoever does not love does not know God, because God is love.” 1 John 4:8

Love Your God

It is through spending time in scripture that we get to know who God is. It is through the development of our relationship with him that we get know him. Once you commit your life to God have you continued to pursue Him? Or does your pursuit of God simply occur on a Sunday morning? Getting to know who God is, who he was, and who he will be, can not be fully achieved by hearing one man speak once a week for 15-30 minutes at a time. You need to fill your heart and your mind with His word. In the same way, we must nourish our bodies with good healthy food daily so we have energy to go complete our tasks, so must we nourish our souls daily. “All Scripture is God-breathed and is useful for teaching, rebuking, correcting and training in righteousness, so that the servant of God may be thoroughly equipped for every good work.” 2 Timothy 3:16-17

As we get to know God we learn that we are called first to love him with all our being. (Luke 10:27) The question so often when faced with this though is what does this look like? Well in part it is talking(praying) and listening (reading scripture) to Him. Another facet of loving God is acting on that love, and stepping up answering the call he has set forth to believers. “You are the salt of the earth. But if the salt loses its saltiness, how can it be made salty again? It is no longer good for anything, except to be thrown out and trampled underfoot. You are the light of the world. A town built on a hill cannot be hidden. Neither do people light a lamp and put it under a bowl. Instead they put it on its stand, and it gives light to everyone in the house.  In the same way, let your light shine before others, that they may see your good deeds and glorify your Father in heaven.” Matthew 5: 13-16 In other words live in such a way that you are pointing others back to God in all that you do.

At the end of the day remember this: God loves you. God is the perfect example of unconditional love. No matter how much we love Him it will never be perfect. We will stumble. We will fall. At times we may even backslide in our walks with Him. God knows this. He is not surprised by our sinful and selfish nature. That is why he sent Jesus to die on the cross. So you wouldn’t have to pay the penalty for your sin. Jesus paid that penalty. All you need to do is accept Jesus. Have you? If not I would be more than happy to discuss this more with you. Just know that you do not need to earn God’s love. He loves us right where we are. That is not to say he doesn’t call us to live a life that would be honoring to him, because he does, instead I am saying as long as you are seeking him and putting him first in all you do then you are on the right path.

Join me next week as we take a look at things from the husband’s perspective, and reflect upon the verse, “However, each one of you also must love his wife as he loves himself, and the wife must respect her husband.” Ephesians 5: 33 And if you missed last week’s post on love please go check out Fruit of the Spirit: Love -Introduction.

***Have you ever considered your walk with God to be a relationship of give and take? In what ways do you seek to develop your relationship with him?***

***If there is anything on your heart that you would like to share that I didn’t cover, please feel free to bring it up in the comments. I would love to be able to answer questions, even if only to say that is a good question I had never considered it and I don’t know. Either way know I am here for you and would love to hear your thoughts.***

Now I would also like to introduce The Bloggers Brag Pinterest Party. I have contributed to the Pinterest Party for a couple of weeks now. It has been a great opportunity for my blog to find new readers and for me to find helpful blogs on a variety of subjects. Last week my introduction post on love (for the fruit of the spirit) gathered the most clicks of any link shared. This gave me the opportunity this week to co-host. So with no further adieu I bring to you The Bloggers Brag Pinterest Party.

 

 

Bloggers Brags logo

My post for Fruit of the Spirit:  Love was the most clicked on the last Bloggers Brags Pinterest Party, and so that means that I am the

BloggersBragsWeeklyPinterestPartyfeaturedblogger

  and the co-host for the Bloggers Brags Pinterest Party this week!    What that means for you is that you are able to link up this week here at [Sara] Under the Sun as well as at Creative K Kids and Denverista and A Life in Tune!  Link up and tell your friends!  The most clicked link will be the featured blogger next week as well as have the opportunity to be the co-host!  You can go here to see my post about Love (Fruit of the Spirit)!

Fruit of the Spirit

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LET’S GET OUR PARTY ON!

Rules of the Bloggers Brags Weekly Pinterest Party

  • Be a follower of your hosts and co-hosts.

Pinterest Party Hosts Are...

Pictures of the Bloggers Brags Pinterest Party hosts

{Misty @ Denverista (facebook) or twitter or Pinterest or google+}  

{Tammy @ Creative K Kids (facebook) or twitter or Pinterest or google+}

Follow this week’s Co-hosts:

sara & rachel

{Rachel @ A Life in Tune (facebook) or Pinterest}

{Sara@ [Sara] Under the Sun (facebook) or Pinterest}

  • Pin our Pinterest party button or a visible link onto your sidebar, post, or party page. This will help others to find our party and will bring more visibility to your links! 

Creative K Kids



  • Please make sure that you link directly to your post’s URL and not to your blog’s URL.
  • Pin the two links before yours! If EVERYONE pins, then everyone will get more Pinterest love!
  • Link up a maximum of 3 links. They can be old or new–they’re all new to us, and we want to see them!
  • OPTIONAL: Follow our Bloggers Brags Board on Pinterest. You don’t have to do this; but of course, you’ll want to! We will be pinning all of these links to that board which will also gain more exposure for you! You can find the Bloggers Brags board here.

Here are just a few more details!

  • Whoever receives the most clicks from Monday through Thursday will be featured in the next Bloggers Brags post! Not only will they be featured, but they will be offered the optional opportunity to be a co-host for the week in which they are featured. Everyone that links up will be required to follow the co-host as well as the hosts; and in return, the co-host would be required to add the linky to their blog on the day the linky goes live. So tell your friends and followers to come link up and to visit your blog through your link!
Creative K Kids



  • Disclosure: By linking up and including a picture, you agree to allow Creative K Kids and Denverista and any co-hosts to use your pictures and links in any future posts. Your photo may also be used for promotion on all social media outlets of Creative K Kids and Denverista as well as any future co-hosts.  We also may link your printables and other resources up to our permanent linkys to gain you more exposure.
  • If you include your e-mail in the linky form below you will be added to a weekly reminder e-mail when the link party goes live. Your e-mail will not to added to any other lists or given out.
  • If you’ve been featured, please grab the featured button below to add some brag to your sidebar!
  • Please do not add any shops, reviews, giveaways or link-up parties.  Links that do not comply may be removed.

‘); // ]]>

Fruit of the Spirit: Love- Introduction

“But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, forbearance, kindness, goodness, faithfulness,” Galatians 5:22

Fruit of the Spirit

Love is the first attribute of the fruit of the spirit mentioned. Because it is the first, I want to take time to carefully examine how we are letting God’s love work in us, and through us. In fact, love is such a large  subject, that when I started on it I found it so intimidating to write about. I was worried about trying to fit everything into just one post. After some time spent praying and thinking, and then more thinking and praying I concluded that I will be writing several posts on the topic of love. So sit back get comfortable and join me as I look at look love from different angles over the coming weeks. “Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres.” 1 Corinthians 13: 4-7

***If this is a series that you are excited to follow would you please consider sharing the link with your friends via Facebook, Pinterest, Twitter, or even emailing it to someone. The point is the more people join us in this series the richer the discussions in the comment section can be. Who knows maybe a friend of yours will need this message today.***

Creative K Kids

Happy Anniversary: Ten Beautiful Years

I know I had said I was going to take the month of December off, but this post could not wait until January. Today, Dec 13, 2013, celebrates 10 years of marriage for myself and Rusty. It is that milestone I want to take moment and write about today. Some days I can hardly believe that the good Lord has granted us a decade of marriage so far.
 
Ephesians 5 31
 

My love,

One year ago we were celebrating 9 years in Canton, MI. In this last year we have lived in three homes. Saw a job change, and the birth of our beautiful and silly third born daughter. We have also started homeshooling. I have started a blog. Most importantly we have faced the challenges together, and with the Lord before us. “In your heart you plan your life. But the LORD decides where your steps will take you.”  Proverbs 16: 9 (NIRV)

Two years ago we were celebrating 8 years in Norfolk, VA. I can’t even remember what we did that anniversary, but I remember we were spending it together despite the fact the month before at that time we had anticipated you being in Bahrain. As it was the Navy had other plans.  You were being ERB’d out and were home with us. That year saw the birth of our sweet little ‘bruiser,’ Paige. It saw us sending you away on a deployment and your return. Your return meant facing the unknown, and going forth in a direction we had not planned. In this I chose to remember, ” For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the Lord, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.” Jeremiah 29:11

Three years ago we were back in Norfolk, after you tried your hand recruiting in Saginaw. That year you made me a wonderful hand-made gift. Sadly I have yet to use the beauty. Still I hope one day to see the thing put to good use. I love you and appreciate all your hard work. “Enjoy life with the wife whom you love, all the days of your vain life that he has given you under the sun, because that is your portion in life and in your toil at which you toil under the sun.”  Ecclesiastes 9:9

Four years ago we celebrated 6 years in Saginaw, MI. This year we celebrated our anniversary with our not even two-month old miracle baby, Chloe. After years of trying, failing, and praying the Lord blessed us with Miss Chloe. When I think back to 2009 I think the joy in finding out we would be expecting our first, her birth, and how you had decided to give recruiting a go. “Your eyes saw my unformed body; all the days ordained for me were written in your book before one of them came to be.” Psalm 139:16 

The flowers Rusty got me for our 5th wedding anniversary, Dec 13th, 2008.

The flowers Rusty got me for our 5th wedding anniversary, Dec 13th, 2008.

Five years ago we celebrated our anniversary together, after having spent months apart. It was a challenging year. We saw some of our lowest lows, but we made it through. When I wandered you never let go. It was your turn to hold on tight.  Thank you for sticking by my side, darling. “Two are better than one, because they have a good reward for their toil. For if they fall, one will lift up his fellow. But woe to him who is alone when he falls and has not another to lift him up! Again, if two lie together, they keep warm, but how can one keep warm alone?” Ecclesiastes 4: 9-11

Six years ago we had faced another year that was challenging. There was a period I was sure we wouldn’t see five years of marriage. Through tears and prayers I held on the best I could. We came back together. Things were not perfect, but life is a journey and we decided to travel it together. “Then Peter came to Jesus and asked, “Lord, how many times shall I forgive my brother when he sins against me? Up to seven times? “Jesus answered, “I tell you, not seven times, but seventy-seven times.” Matthew 18: 21-22

Seven years ago we spent our anniversary apart. It was not due to fighting, but rather due to duty. Your duty to your country had you serving aboard a ship, The Wasp.  It was gone this day. As far as that year goes, we had bought our first house and began turning it into a home. A sweet little (843 sq ft) two bedroom home that served us well until 2011. While that home no longer stands it will forever hold many memories, both good and bad. “The wise woman builds her house, but with her own hands the foolish one tears hers down.” Proverbs 14: 1

Eight years ago, in 2005, we were celebrating our anniversary for the first time in Virginia. In our apartment on the bay we had a lovely view of the water and the base.  You could fish from the pier. I could sit on the porch and watch the water. From the porch I discovered I could also see when your ship was in port and when it was away. It was in that home my body began a journey back to health. While we didn’t realize it at the time it was a year of rest. The years to come would hold challenges we  beyond anything we had yet to even imagine, granted most of them were of our own design. “He makes me lie down in green pastures, he leads me beside quiet waters” Psalms 23: 2

Nine years ago we celebrated our very first anniversary. It was bittersweet. I was sick in bed and you lovingly kept watch over me. While the chemotherapy took its toll you ,my best friend, stood by my side tending to me. Thank you for holding my hair when I was sick. Thank you for picking me up when I went down.  Thank you for standing by my side, wrapping my frail form in your arms, and loving me even when I was bald. “Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her” Ephesians 5: 25

Happy Anniversary: Ten Beautiful Years

On our wedding day I married my best friend. 10 years later I am still married to my best friend. We have come through some difficult times. We have had our lows, and we have seen marvelous views from the mountain top moments. Since life does not occur at the top of the mountains, but rather in the valleys. I am ready to see more valleys with you by my side, because with you by my side I know we will reach the next mountain top.  “For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and the two will become one flesh.” Ephesians 5:31

My prayer for us is this:

Dear Lord,

May we keep our eyes fixed upon you. May my hand hold fast to my husband. May our knees be quick to drop to pray when the going gets tough. May patience, kindness, love, gentleness, and self-control rule our lives. And may we always be a light for you in this world.

Amen

 

***Thank you for sharing these memories with me, dear reader. What are some special memories you share with your spouse? And if this has touched your heart please feel free to share it.***

 

Denverista
’Blessed

{Rusty} Under The Sun: I’m thankful for my wife

Look, her hair is coming back!

A picture of Sara, about four months after her last round of chemo nearly killed her.

Many of you don’t know me.  You probably know of me, though.  My name is Rusty, I am Sara’s husband, and webmaster for the site.  At the beginning of the month, Sara approached me and asked me if I would write a piece for her month of thankfulness.  Well, here it is.  One of the things that I am most thankful for is my wife.  Read on to find out why.

Love.  Sara has it in spades.  When we first met, we were both teenagers.  Being the young introvert that I was, I always did my best to drive people away.  I had a few friends, and Sara was only my third girlfriend.  I knew I liked her, but had no way to show it, and tried to push her away a great many times.  Early in our relationship, she had decided that she loved me.  I don’t know how, she had met my family, and even spent a great deal of time at my house.  Either way, it was because of her love that she stuck by, even when I made some bonehead mistake, or hurt her feelings.  Even today, you can see how much she loves based on her interactions with our daughters.  You can see it when she talks to the neighbors, or even to complete strangers.  She is not naive, but she still likes to look at life with rose colored glasses.  And I desperately need that in my life.  She always knows when to give me space, or when to say something.

I'm Thankful For My Wife

My wife is strong.  Now, I know, a lot of you are likely thinking “all women are strong,” or “my wife has had X kids, naturally,” or “I have four kids and a full time job.”  I get it.  No woman has it easy when they decide to partner up with just about any man.   As a veteran in the U.S. Navy, and having served with the U.S. Army, too; I know my share of strong women.  But I need to tell you, my wife takes the cake.  She miscarried about a year after we started dating.  Then again, seven months after we were married.  As far as things go, the two were not that bad.  No hospitalization, just a check up with the doc, and some pain meds, and things happened naturally.  Now, the second miscarriage might have been a blessing in disguise.  After nine months of marriage, we discovered that Sara had a severe form of Osteosarcoma.

The form of cancer she had was fairly rare.  We were told that there was about a 1 in 3 fatality rate, but that it was discovered early enough, and that the long term survivability rate is nearly 7 in 10.  When they biopsied the tumor, they did not find any concern to merit chemotherapy, so, they did the surgery on 7th September, 2004.  They removed 95% of her left humerus (the upper arm bone), and inserted an endoprosthetic made of a  titanium / magnesium alloy.  The surgeon that performed the surgery didn’t feel it was necessary to attempt to sew the muscles back together so that she would have any motion afterwards.  Which means her arm now hangs limp at her side. Nine years later.  She manages though, quite well, I might add.  About two and a half weeks after the surgery, the doctors came back and told us that over a third of the tumor had, in fact, been ‘high grade cancer’ as they termed it.  Which meant that if one cell had left the tumor and stopped somewhere else in her body, it would form a new tumor there.  Most often, it hits the lungs first, which has a higher mortality rate.  So, ‘we’ started chemo.

Sara was supposed to get eight rounds of chemo, but, due to complications, only received seven.  The last one almost caused her to develop leukemia, cancer of the blood.  She spent two weeks in isolation.  She couldn’t have flowers, or fresh fruits or vegetables.  She quite literally had no immune system to speak of.  When the doctor told her that the treatment for it is more chemo, she said she would not be doing any more.  I was devastated, but she assured me that she would be fine, and she got better.  All this chemo, while it may have saved her life, had cause her body to go into menopause.  If you read yesterday’s post, you already know that Sara beat menopause, too.

There is not much she can’t do.  I love her more and more each day, and I am ever so thankful that the Lord saw fit to partner me up with her.  She supports all my crazy ideas, like the fact that my garage is a haphazard machine shop while I build my CNC machine.  She has followed me to four duty stations, five deployments, the last of which she had a four month old and a two year old.  She followed me back to Michigan when I separated, and most recently, here to Alabama, so I can work for NASA.

I love you, Sara, and I am happy to let the whole world know it!

Me and Sara, 17ish

Me and Sara, 17ish

 ***Who in your life are you thankful for? Why are they so special?***

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Creative K Kids

From Menopause to Motherhood: The Blessings That Are Children

Rusty and I knew we wanted children even before we were married. We wanted a house full of laughter and love. Less than a year into our marriage we faced a stumbling block to whether or not this might ever happen the way we envisioned, I was diagnosed with cancer and would need chemotherapy. The chemotherapy did as chemo often does, it took a devastating toll on my body. By our first anniversary we had already had one of what would be many conversations concerning what we would do if we came out of this unable to get pregnant.

From Menopause to Motherhood

By our second anniversary we knew though. We knew that the chemotherapy drugs had thrown my body into an early menopause at the age of 21. In the years that followed we talked to three different fertility specialists, tried rounds of different drugs (to stimulate fertility,) and during one of his deployments we had hoped to save up enough money to try the donor egg program. In the end the doctors didn’t provide much hope. They explained how multiple tests showed I was post menopausal not even pre. Even the fertility drugs seemed to tell us that donor egg was the only way to go. Yet during his deployment we never quiet got the 10s of thousands of dollars set aside.

It was during that deployment I started to think that maybe a life without children would not be so bad. I know that there are many paths to parenthood, but at that point in our lives we were at an impasse concerning what that would mean. Yes I knew anything was possible with God, but at this point in my life it seemed to me that miracles happened to other people. We went back and forth on whether a donor egg was a way to achieve that miracle, or maybe we would adopt. In the end though I decided I was comfortable not having children of our own.

God had other plans though, as he often does. When Rusty returned home from Iraq, we had not saved up for the donor egg procedure, and I was alright with that. What did happen though was he came home in December and by Valentine’s Day I had learned I was pregnant. To say the news thrilled us was an understatement. We were walking on air. After all I had been through to get to this point, including two miscarriages even before the chemotherapy, I knew that this was nothing less than a modern-day miracle. My doctors all declared it was a miracle as well.

That pregnancy, as things were, turned out to be pretty uneventful. I was blessed with a pretty easy pregnancy. It gave me time to think. Think about how we hoped that this meant a door was opening so that we could have more children, yet even if this was not the case we were still thankful for one. In October of 2009 I gave birth to Chloe, my sweet, beautiful, servant-minded child.

By the time she was 6 almost 7 months old, I would learn I was pregnant again. It was another miracle! In February 2011 we were blessed with our second little miracle. Miss Paige is our rough and tough little girl who has a tender heart and wants nothing but to share her love.

In March of 2012 the blessings seemed to come to a terrifying stop. I miscarried again, and this time I was in the ER, after having arrived by ambulance. I lost enough blood that I needed a blood transfusion. We knew though, as sad and scary as this was, we had already been blessed. Those two girls were and are, blessing upon blessing.

It was upon the heals of that miscarriage though, I would get pregnant with our youngest daughter! Miss Madelyn was born January of this year, 2013. God is good.

I tell you this to let you know I have been there, I understand the pain of infertility, but I also know the joy of motherhood. Yes motherhood has its challenges and raising three strong-willed children between the ages of 4 and 9 months can be taxing. But it is a journey that I appreciate, and I value. It is a journey that is from the Lord.

From Menopause to Motherhood

To this day if you were to run a blood panel on me it would show that I am in menopause. I should not be able to have children according to modern medicine, yet the Lord has blessed me with 3 little girls. So it is for these three little miracles I want to thank the Lord for today!

***Do you have a story of infertility, miscarriage, or pregnancy you would like to share today? Or perhaps you are in need of a comforting ear. I am here for you. You can reach me through my contact page, Under the Sun’s Facebook page, or just leave a comment.***